You’ve only got one chance to make sure your first impression isn’t a last impression.
So show up prepared — mentally and physically. Think of this groundwork as some pre-exercise stretching. It keeps you at the top of your game and stops you from pulling anything if the action gets heated.
Go In The Know
First dates, especially blind dates, require a host of practical preparations. Get to know a bit about your date through Internet research. Vivien W. from Oakland admits, “I verify my date’s info through excessive Googling, particularly if it is a blind date. I can find anyone online, either through their work, Facebook account, sporting events, charitable stuff, etc. I want to make sure that the guy is respectable and associated with a real place of work.”
Not only will this enable you to feel at ease about your date’s outlook on life, but you’ll also have some conversation-starters having peeked through their public past and peccadilloes.
Pump It Up
Doing something active before hooking up with someone new has many benefits, which may explain its popularity with singles. Dancing around the bedroom to the Priscilla, Queen of the Desert soundtrack has worked for me for years, and another — perhaps more agile — friend does cartwheels down her hall to connect with her quirky inner child.
Carl M. from Toronto confesses, “I like to get some exercise before a date because it wakes me up, gets me energized and feeling happy through endorphin release.” The message here is to do whatever you need to do to feel fun and full of life, as this attitude will give you a glow and solidify your sense of confidence.
Come to Rest
If you suffer from a case of the jitters, best to enjoy a few minutes alone before you go out and share yourself with someone else. You only get to make a first impression once, so it’s important to deal with or work through any pent-up nervous energy. Meditating, drinking tea, reading fiction and massaging your hands or feet are all good ways to deal with that case of nerves.
And speaking of massaging, masturbating before meeting other singles provides the benefits of that calmer sutra of a great O. The research backs up this practice. It is well documented that masturbation releases endorphins into the bloodstream (causing a sense of well-being and acting as a natural pain reliever) and causes the body to produce oxytocin (akin to valium), which stimulates relaxation and calms nerves.
Going on a date with someone new can be thrilling and invigorating. But it’s important to keep that rush in perspective and to always be alert and prepared. Don’t assume that Mr. New Guy will be Mr. Nice Guy just because your coworker knows him from the gym. So put your safety first, and tell a friend where you’re going and with whom. Promise to call your pal the minute you get home.
Supply Your Demand
Rubber, prophylactic, sheath, blob, scumbag, Frenchie, flunky, glove, Johnny, raincoat, safe, condom. Whatever you call it, pack one in your pants or purse before embarking on your rendezvous. You just never know what you’ll feel like doing.
It’s a Plan
Nothing worse than that first in-person encounter that gets off to an awkward start with, “So, what do you want to do?” Followed by, of course, “I don’t know. What do YOU want to do?” The solution, says Colleen K. from Seattle, is a few minutes of prep: “I always check concert, event and movie listings in case there’s nothing to say and you need something to do.” It doesn’t have to be set in stone (spontaneity is much more fun and doesn’t run the risk of you looking too eager or of feeling disappointed because things didn’t go as you’d expected), but it’s good to have an idea or two in waiting.
Looking your best ensures you feel your best. Make sure to set aside enough time before your date to work through your body prep routine — trim, shave, pluck, wax, exfoliate, moisturize… whatever it takes so that you feel sexy. My friend Lina G. from Toronto once gave me the following great advice: “Take one close-up look and one from-afar look in the mirror before stepping outside.” In the hours leading up to your outing, remember to eat foods that you know agree with your tummy and don’t cause uncomfortable bloating and gas.
No one likes a tooter.